Sunday, December 7, 2008
This is me today
Fighting depression I seem to go through my life on auto pilot. Trying to not bump to hard into others so that I can survive. My empty auto pilot mind is accustomed to do the work. I seem to just wander around in the emptiness I call a life. My hart slowly turns into a hard piece as I get hurt again and again. I never wanted to be one of those people, I think. But it seems inevitable as the pain in life seems to take over at times and I cannot put myself out there yet another time. My joy seems to have gone missing today....I'm not sure where it went. Wish I could find it.........
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Wow Suni, I am sorry to hear this. Hopefully your joy will come back and make this a temporary feeling. I know what it is like to lose joy, it almost makes it that much sweeter when it comes back though. I love you. Ohh, Feddia has a blog as well, if you'd like to follow it. She is following yours so you can find it easy, she should be the only person who doesn't look familiar in your followers, but start getting used to her.
The depressive aspect is diffult, honey, I know. As to the hardened heart tired of being hurt? Walking through fears, and accepting those risks isn't easy, but the pay off is loving someone...even if only for awhile. When fear of being hurt takes over? That's when we start hiding in the shadows watching others live lives we only wish we could live. Not a happy place to dwell. I love you.
I know you so know that I KNOW how you feel. I have become a bit..BITTER myself honey. Shit sucks sometimes. But, I agree with MOM... its so worth it.. for the good times we share with someone.. even if it does not last forever. xoxo ~Girl-Infamous-Sushi-Divine
Post a Comment